Newborn Amnesia

I held a newborn baby girl in my arms today. She was so small, delicate and beautiful.

The first time parents of the baby were standing in front of me looking tierd and worn. The husband, in particular, looked completely shell shocked. I felt so bad for him. Poor guy, he looked like he had just been hit in the face with a bat. Blood shot eyes, messy hair, and a look of total bewilderment on his face. Do you remember that time?

I can't remember it exactly...it's pretty much all hazy. I can't remember feeling that lost. Oh, don't get me wrong, I'm sure I was but I just don't remember it that well. As I was holding the baby, her mother asked me if my children were born with a full head of hair like her daughter. This is what I said, "yes, yes....ahhhhh, I think so....hmmm, maybe not. No no no, I'm pretty sure they were."

Isn't that weird? I just couldn't remember. I was pretty sure one of my sons was born with a full head of hair but I just couldn't remember if both of them were. Then I thought, what kind of a mother doesn't remember the way her babies were born?

Well, apparently this kind. There are a lot of things from those first few weeks that I just don't remember, and the parts that I do remember are kind of hazy and flow into each other like scenes from a movie...a scene here of feeding the baby in the middle of the night or a scene there with the baby sleeping in my arm but all the hard parts in between are mostly repressed.

I think it must be nature's way of ensuring that the human race goes forward because if we remembered all the moments of insanity and sleepless mania in their full glory, I don't know if anyone would have more than one child!

As I was holding that precious miracle of life and looking into her deep brown eyes, I wondered if I would ever do it again. Go through all those beginning moments again. I'm just don't know....what I do know is that I'll be sleeping through the night tonight and loving every minute of it!